Self

I wonder just how far a person is willing to go to be known, truly known, by another. Is it in our genetic makeup to be incomplete without someone else? And if that is the case, do we feel complete, no, can we feel complete, without being fully understood by that person?

When do you reach a point when you believe that another person knows you? There's no way that anyone will know your whole life story. What are the important parts that tell the story of who you are?

Is it possible for someone to figure it out without knowing ANY of your story? How much of who you are is the sum of your experiences, and is it important to know that to decipher the truth?

I don't know why I wonder. I know that the desire to be known is powerful. I wonder if it's possible.

Yesterday...

was a day of birthdays!  And none of them were little people.  (bonus!)

My friend turned 40 yesterday, but because my sister-in-law's surprise birthday party was yesterday evening, I asked my friend if I could make her breakfast.  I really would love to have thrown her a big bash (it's 40!!  that's a big one), but I don't know any of her friends, and it wouldn't have been much of a bash with just us!  Plus, I suck at planning parties, and am MUCH better at cooking for people.

She said yes, so I asked her what her favorite breakfast food was.  She started to go with something easy, but I insisted that she tell me her FAVORITE food.  So she confessed that it was eggs benedict.  EGGS BENEDICT!  was what I was thinking, but what I said was "that's cool, I can make that."  LOL

Since I've never made, but happen to also love, eggs benedict I had to do some research.  I had seen a recipe for a simple hollandaise on my favorite recipe site : www.thepioneerwoman.com, so I searched through her library of recipes to find it again.  A good hollandaise can make or break eggs benedict, and she has wonderful taste in food, so I trusted her recipe.  (Unlike some that I have to "test" before adding to my growing binder of recipes.)

And crazily enough I had just watched a portion of Martha Steward Living (I hate Martha Stewart, just so we're clear), where she was demonstrating how to make eggs benedict!  I didn't see enough to know why she was doing the demonstration (if it was her recipe or someone else's), but she definitely made it look like a breeze!

Anyway, to make this rather long story shorter...  They came out great, along with country potatoes that were NOT as great, she busted out an incredibly expensive, well aged, purchased-in-France bottle of champagne, and it was an amazingly great breakfast.  Happy Birthday Suz!

And then off to a play date for Avery in the middle of the day, and then to get ready for my sister-in-law's party.

Her husband and my father-in-law planned the whole thing, and my f-i-l asked me to be the bartender.  Well, he asked me if I knew anything about being a bartender and I said no, but promptly volunteered for the job because I would LOVE to be a bartender but don't know anything about mixing drinks since my newfound love of alcohol is relatively recent!

But!  I have an iPhone, and apparently....  there's an app for that!  Woohoo!

(And he printed out the recipes for Cosmos and Lemon Drops, so we had those covered.)

So I got busy making sure EVERYONE was drinking, and what kind of bartender would I be if I didn't taste the concoctions I was pushing??  So, needless to say by the end of the evening I was VERY happy and VERY friendly! We completely trashed my f-i-l's house (so sorry!) and I was barely upright and couldn't help clean up, even though the sensible side of my brain was telling the foggy, giggly other side of my brain that I really should!

All in all, it was a fun day!

Respect

Several people have given me words of praise and encouragement lately, and I can't believe what an impact it has had on me.  It's interesting to think that I have had a positive affect on someone else just by being, much less more than one person.  It's also interesting how far a few positive words go.

I wrote a thank you to my academic advisor, who I respect immensely, and told her that it has been an honor to know her.  And it has.  She is brilliant, well-read, well-spoken, and writes beautifully.  She has been incredibly patient with the reading and editing, re-reading and re-editing, re-re-reading, etc. that was required to get my thesis ready to submit.  I was quite impressed with her dedication, attention to detail, and her genuine interest in seeing her students produce a quality product.

She responded by saying she felt the same about me!  Me?  Really?

Then I realized that my idea of success is to be respected by someone I admire.  Does that mean I've made it?  ;-)

Who would you be...?

A friend asked a question in his blog today that has intrigued me. He said who would you be if you had complete freedom to be whoever you wanted to be?

And I wondered, does anyone have that freedom? How much of who you are is shaped by circumstance?

I know kids have a unique personality, so there is that. But life does change you. Hardship, expectations, society, all have a say in who you are.

When first I thought about the question, I thought that probably only the kids of the very rich would have that kind of freedom to be whoever they wanted. But even they have expectations set on them. They are expected to live up to their status, act a specific way, not embarrass their parents. Some choose to rebel, but even that is a function of circumstance.

I know the school of hard knocks changes a person. Adapting to hardship makes a big difference in who you are.

That's what I think, anyway. Do you agree? Who would you be if you had the complete freedom to be whoever you think you wanted to be? Would you be who you are now? Or would you be someone completely different?