Church

I had a conversation last night with a friend about church; what church is, versus what church should be.  I fell asleep thinking about what it must have been like for the early Christians.

Right after Jesus ascended, as the early church was forming, there was such an excitement among the people who believed his message.  There is a comment in the book of Acts about how the believers gathered every day to eat together and fellowship.

I imagine it was like the release of the new iPhone.  When all those techy geeks couldn't help getting together to talk about their new toy, and compare applications, and share discoveries on how it worked and what it could do.  Everyone was talking about it, writing about it, excited about it.  The non techy's couldn't help but see that excitement and wonder if they shouldn't also have an iPhone.  I mean, if it was that great...

Now imagine 2000 years ago.  These people were living through a time of unrest.  They were being occupied by a government so powerful they couldn't do anything about it.  They were powerless to shield their children from seeing their own people being horrifically murdered on crosses lining the streets.  The most they could hope for was that the occupying army wouldn't destroy their temples or force them into breaking their own laws.  There were many/some/a few scholars who believed that the prophecies pointed to this time as being the time of the messiah.  There was supposed to be a liberator coming soon.  

There had already been a few attempts.  They had seen men come and go claiming to be the messiah.  These "messiahs" would be charismatic enough to gather large groups of followers, and inevitably their message would turn to revolution and liberation from Roman rule.  They would then be crucified for treason, their followers would all go home, and the whole thing would fade away.

And then came Jesus.  He was charismatic -- at least there was something about him that drew crowds.  He claimed to be the son of God, bringing salvation.  Somehow, though, Rome and the occupation never seemed to come up.  All he ever seemed to talk about was the character of a man.  He seemed much more concerned with the individual than the nation of Israel as a whole.  He talked on and on in riddles and stories about fictional characters.  Yet it seemed that every person in the audience connected with him.  Whatever random story he told seemed to be about them, or for them, or somehow related to them.

Even without the stories people came, though.  Sure it was cool to hear him speak, but he was healing people at the same time.  People near and far had heard about him restoring sight to the blind, healing cripples, touching lepers and healing them of this hideously deadly disease.  That was the interesting part.  He actually TOUCHED all these unclean people, who by law should be shunned.  Who wouldn't be interested in seeing a guy like that?

Granted, when his following got large enough, everyone WANTED him to start talking about revolution.  I mean, what was a messiah for if not to end this oppressive occupation?  Didn't the prophecies say he would save them?  But Jesus stubbornly refused to comply.  He always had some slippery answer that wasn't really an answer whenever someone brought up the subject.

And then he ended up dead.  Just like the rest of them.  Crucified, no less, which was even more humiliating and disturbing.  Enough people witnessed his death that the news spread like wildfire.  Those closest to him, his disciples, were at a loss.  What would they do now?  They had spent the last three years of their lives following him around and spreading his message.

Then the sightings began.  First Mary and Martha swear they saw him alive.  Then the disciples, then hundreds of people witness it.  He was alive?  How could that be?  But they had seen him with their own eyes, touched him with their own hands, and finally understood what the liberation and salvation was all about that he had talked endlessly about.

This was exciting!  How could you not be excited about seeing a dead guy alive again, and then SEEING him going up into the light?  So many people saw it that they couldn't very well ALL be dismissed as insane.  That, coupled with the amazing things he had said and done before he died made for interesting conversation.  How could you not get together to talk about this?  Add in the fear of ending up just like him if they were caught, and you have a group of people that TRULY believe that Jesus was the messiah, the christ.  You couldn't be a half-believer.  The risk of death was great.  Too great to be unclear about where you stood.

So this group of excited believers get together on a regular basis to talk about what they'd seen, who had witnessed what, how they had personally connected with the message Jesus brought.  Then, one day, as Peter is preaching this message, the holy spirit comes to them.  The spirit filled the room in a physical way.  Everyone could SEE the spirit hovering over everyone else, and all hell breaks loose (so to speak) as people start weeping, and laughing, and jabbering in languages they didn't know.  This was real.  It was something they could see.  It wasn't an "I think I've got the holy spirit" kind of thing.

And then the persecutions really ramped up, and the people scattered, sharing this amazing thing with anyone who would listen.  And as they spread, they gathered new groups that would come together on a regular basis, at least on the sabbath, and talk about this new experience.  This was joyful community.  They had everything in common with each other.  They believed something that could get them killed.  But how could they not when they could see every day, with their own eyes, the manifestations of love that resulted from this?

This church was a community.  They couldn't wait until their day of rest, or the end of their workday, so they could hang out together and share their hospitality and experiences.  They were so excited about what was happening in their lives, they couldn't shut up about it and mind their own business.  There was no doubt about the reality of what was happening; they could see the holy spirit come into a person, and witness the gifts that came with that.

This was noticed by outsiders.  This movement was noticed as far away as Rome itself.  People were drawn to this community of equality and belonging.

This is not how I see the church today.  Christianity is not exciting.  It is not about love and worship, equality and sharing.  When I think of Christians I think of hypocrisy and name-calling, exclusion and self-righteousness.  Who would be interested in joining that?  I'm not.

Time

It's amazing how the days fly by without even noticing.  It's Friday, finally.

My mind is a whirlwind of fragments.  No thought is sticking around for long, which inevitably puts me in a state of panic.  I feel like I'm forgetting something, or missing something important when my thoughts aren't cohesive.

And for the first time ever I'm having trouble sleeping.  Well, I guess ever is not the right word.  This problem started this year, so it's not exactly new.  But it is still surprising, because I've always been able to sleep through anything.  Nothing ever bothered me enough to affect my sleep.  Now I stay awake at night trying to remember the things I'm supposed to be doing, or worrying about things I can do nothing about.  I always thought that was an old person's affliction.  Am I that old? 

It's Monday...

...and although I'm not happy about that, I am thankful for a wonderful weekend.  Although I didn't get everything done on my to-do list for the weekend, I did have a very nice weekend.

Avery was grounded from watching any television or playing any video games the entire weekend.  So instead of letting him watch his shows (he only gets to watch on the weekends as it is) while I did whatever I usually do (homework, computer work, television, etc.) this is what we did:

Friday evening Avery played a very boring game of Boggle Jr., which he says he enjoyed, although the game entails spelling three or four letter words, then checking if your spelling was correct.  This seemed like something that would not interest him, since he is just learning to read, but he enjoyed the challenge, apparently.

He and I discussed moving his bedtime up from 8:00 pm to 7:30 pm, since he is no longer taking naps, but still needs the extra sleep.  He was upset about that, so we made a deal that if he avoided trouble at school (the reason for his grounding this weekend) for an entire week, we would move his bedtime back to 8:00.  We'll see how it goes.

Saturday morning he got up and played more Boggle by himself.  This is usually when he watches television, as his parents are not early risers!  He fed himself breakfast then came up to see what we were doing.  Saturday morning was our trip to the Farmer's Market for the nutrition class I mentioned, so we got up and got dressed so grandma could pick us up at 8:30.  We were there for two hours, and Avery always likes the Farmer's Market because all of the vendors give taste tests!

The trip ended rather eventfully since he mistakenly chose to sit on a red ant hill to pick a sticker out of his pants, and didn't notice them swarming up his legs until they started biting.  That was traumatic!

When we got home, I made hamburgers for lunch that were oh-so-good!  I've been craving big juicy hamburgers, and none are better than home-made, imho!

We played Monopoly Jr., then Avery and I walked to a nearby park, where he played while I read the chapter in my textbook that was on my homework list for the weekend.  My husband picked us up from there so we could go to Chicago Fire for dinner.  Yum!

Sunday morning Avery got up and took a bath!  Without my telling him to!  Granted, he didn't seem to have washed much, and was not convinced he should get back into the bath once he was out and dried, but I appreciated the initiative!  Then he worked on building Legos while I got showered and prettied up to go out.  It was Grandpa's birthday this week, and we were celebrating with a lunch on Sunday.

We left early from there to go see a local production of Snow White.  We were meeting a friend of mine, who has a six-year-old boy also, and although Avery professed NOT to like Snow White, or the dwarves, or any prince/princess movie, he sat entirely enthralled through the whole two-hour production!

My friend offered to take him back to her house so the boys could play, so I got three hours to myself.  My husband and I had daytime sex, which was fantastic, and then I made a nutritious, yet yummy dinner.  :-)

All in all it was a nice weekend.  I did squeeze in two 30-minute sessions on my Wii Fit (which is usually the extent of my exercise routine these days), but I didn't get the homework done for my Wednesday night class.  I really dislike the class, so I know I am avoiding doing it on purpose.  I also know that this is going to catch up to me soon, but ah well...  At least the Snow White production counted as work for the class, since it is a Children's Theater class!  Interestingly, the part that I dislike about the class is all the writing required.  Go figure!

Nutrition

Last week, I signed up to take a nutrition class.  It was recommended by a friend.  It's a 6 week course meeting once a week.

I've been interested in improving my nutritional intake ever since I did a three month "experiment" to clean out and heal my body.  I went to a holistic doctor who taught me quite a bit about how what we eat affects all of our body health, not just the parts that get fat!  During the three months I honestly ate the foods he recommended, I felt wonderful.

The constant migraines that had plagued me for many years were completely gone.  The neck and shoulder pain that I attributed to tension was gone.  The subtle aches and pains that I rarely notice because they are always there were also gone.  I'd never felt so good.

However, eating nutritiously takes a lot of time and sacrifice, and I wasn't able to sustain it.

Because of this, I wasn't expecting a whole lot from this class, but I am always willing to hear about how I SHOULD be eating.

But the instructor, Amanda (www.eatyourroots.org), said something that struck me and was super simple to understand:  we need to eat like people ate 100 years ago.

It seems that around 80 years ago, there was a butter shortage in this country.  This instigated a government push for an artificial substitute, which started a whole series of artificial additives and  preservatives being created.  I know that might be a bit simplistic, but that was the gist of the lesson.  The point is, in the last century we've been morphing our food into something so very far from it's natural state that our bodies have a really hard time dealing with this foreign matter.

However, this instructor's focus is attainability!  Which is good.  Because the hardest part about eating healthy is the time it takes.  A lot of time is required in planning, purchasing, soaking, thawing, and cooking naturally.

But on the bright side, she did take us to the farmer's market and gave us good examples of the questions to ask farmers about their farming practices.  Ok, so I'm not quite to the attainability part, but maybe soon?  We're only a week into the class.......

Killin' Time

I'm busy.  

Aren't we all?  

I have several unfinished projects on the back burner.  And my day job, of course.  And school.  

But lately, for the last two weeks or so, I feel like I've just been killing time.  I'm not sure why, exactly.  I've been ignoring my school work, and not even thinking about the unfinished projects.  I've barely been getting from one day to the next.

I have been fulfilling my duties for work.  I've also been consistently working on my obsession to finding the secret to lowering my grocery budget, as well as figuring the best budgeting technique for our needs. 

I know part of the problem is that I've been indulging my love of reading.  I love to read fiction.  I have a strict policy of not reading for fun while school is in session, because I can easily get lost in a book and neglect everything else.  However, I have a box full of books I haven't read sitting outside my bedroom door taunting me every time I go in and out.  So, yeah.  I read a couple of them this week.

I've also been watching TV again.  I don't know of a bigger time drain than television.  I generally don't spend much time on that.  The few shows I am interested in get recorded, so I can watch without commercials.  However, watching television is exactly what I want to do when I don't want to think, and I've noticed that I've been doing that a lot these last couple of weeks.

I don't know what the problem is.  I can't explain the sudden lack of focus.  I just know I've been killing time.

Funny.  I didn't think I had any time to kill...